Klyde Picks Up Some Chicks

By Alan Booth

Yoink Museum

Klyde Cheerman the Cheer-up robot was showing a visitor a stone tablet, sweetie-eatie the god of sweets and ghosts also known as pacman.

The visitor pointed up at the sky and said there was an airplane. Klyde turned around to have a look. 

The visitor took his stone tablet and ran off to the Yoink Museum. 

The stone tablet was placed as an exhibit in the museum.

Next it was a greek depiction of the innocence stolen from a hospital by a radio DJ in England. Jimmy Savile 

It was dated to a similar time period. 

Facebook

Klyde Cheerman the Cheer-up robot wanted to know more about Facebook. So he Checked on the Internet. 

Apparently there is a book about Facebook 

Jack and James to Fly

Klyde Cheerman the cheer-up robot was helping out at the airport. They put him incharge of passport inspection. 

Conjoined Twins Jack and James approached the inspection desk. 

Jack's passport had expired but James' passport was ok, so Klyde told Jack he has to stay but James can go. 

The manager of the airport told Klyde that he needed to wake his ideas up but Klyde didn't understand. 

Tell me the news

Klyde Cheerman the cheer-up robot asked his smart speaker for the news.  

He said "Smart Speaker,  tell me the news".  

The Smart Speaker said "Breaking news, Klyde Cheerman is a cheap Skate so his internet is too slow to stream the news". 

Klyde Looks for Jokes

Klyde Cheerman the Cheer-up robot was looking for jokes so he could cheer everyone up. 

Here are some of the jokes he found:

A guy was pickpocketing in a carehome elevator, he was immoral on different levels. 

Two conjoined twins were asked to give their friends a hi5, they clapped their hands. 

A guy was doing his grocery shopping online, he realized they sell engine oil for his car. When he put the oil in, his car went "woooof pooof pooof bang" , it turns out they sold out of the oil and substituted with sunflower oil. (He should check the label first) 

A guy ordered cooking oil online. When he fried his chips and ate them his arse went "pooof caboosh swish wooosh wooooosh", they sold out of sunflower oil and substituted it for 15w40 semi synthetic Motor oil instead. (He should check the label) 

A sat nav sent a car into the ocean, the destination was set to whales. 

A holiday maker asked for a refund, they went to Newquay, it was old. 

Every day in every way I use more soap to wash my face, especially on the forehead. 

Klyde at BHF

Klyde Cheerman the Cheer-up robot thought he would have a look at the British Heart Foundation Charity Shop, a shop full of second hand furniture. The British heart Foundation were trying to raise money to help discover cures for heart diseases. 

Klyde likes British hearts. 

Klyde was inspired to colour in his chrome heart on his chest to look more heart like. (and to make him look less like a generic robot cartoon character). 

klyde was wondering where they get all that furniture from.